So, they say that the residency match is just like getting a job. You have to sell yourself. For those of you who do not know what the match is, it is the process by which medical students are paired with a hospital in order to continue training in their chosen specialty. I guess you could call it an "interview" process. Here is a list of factors that make the medical residency very unlike a regular job.

1.) The powers that be in the medical community just put a cap on how many hours
a resident can work. This magic number is 80 hours. The hospital cannot work you
for longer than 24 hours straight. How many other jobs can legally beat the crap out
of you like this and pretend they're doing you a favor by limiting your work week
to 80 hours? Are they mad? Do the patients really want a doctor that has been
awake for 22 hours passing them pills?!

2.) Yes, residents do get paid. However, medical students have gone to school for 8
years prior to residency training. The average salary is $35,000-$40,000 per year.
The average monthly loan payment is $1000 per month. This sucks. You could
make more money by working 80 hours per week at Taco Bell.

3.) Furthermore, there is no negotiation allowed when it comes to salary. This means
residents make the same amount of money in a place with a low cost of living, like
downriver Michigan, as they do in a place with an astronomically high cost of living,
like San Francisco. In San Francisco, a decent (by decent, I mean not in a
dangerous neighborhood) apartment can run you $1200 per month. Add that
on to your monthly loan payment, and you have exceeded your salary by about
$3400 per year. I ask again, are they mad?

4.) If you are unhappy in your residency, you can leave it. However, it's hard to start
over in another place. There are complicated financial reasons that I don't feel
equal to going into right now. Let me just say, no other institution will want
you. Loser.

To negotiate this process, which includes two giant licensing exams prior to even applying for this "job," I bought a book called Ireson's Getting into a Residency. This book even tells you how to fold your suit into a suitcase. I think there are people out there that are even more anal-retentive than I am. I'm sure those people are in charge of the match, and therefore, in charge of my life. 5:20 PM

I was just watching Newlyweds on MTV. I have decided that Jessica Simpson is the dumbest woman on Earth. I am serious, it is criminal to be that dumb. She didn't know that the chicken of the sea is tuna. She repeatedly asks her husband if he is mad at her. She can't cook, can't clean, and doesn't look at the price tags on things before she buys them. If her husband isn't mad at her I am because she is a moron. It bothers me so much that she is not self-sufficient in any way. It's a good thing she's gorgeous or the rest of the regular women like myself would eat her for breakfast.

On to other news. I spent a horrendous weekend with my parents recently. They're playing their favorite game. "Let's say we're getting divorced so we can make our children miserable!" What I got out of this weekend was a lot of guilt, a sense of how immature my dad is, and strep throat from my brother. Streptococcus pyogenes, if you please! How is it transmitted? fomites. What type of hemolysis does it cause on a blood agar plate? alpha. How do you treat it? Penicillin or a penicillin derivative. If your patient is allergic to penicillin, you can give him or her erythromycin. If the patient is allergic, a type II hypersensitivity reaction will occur and he'll anaphylax in about 10 minutes. If left untreated, some of the s. pygenes sequelae are rheumatic fever and glomerulonephritis. This is how I am giving myself permission to post on my blog. I'm studying at the same time. Whoo hoo!

Even though I have been sick, I have enjoyed staying home and hanging out with Ryan lately. We bought The Matrix Reloaded and the special edition of Christmas Vacation by trading in some of our old movies and CDs. It was so nice to just sit at home and relax. I have been sleeping a lot, too. I'm starting to feel better since I have been resting and taking some antibiotics. Of course, this could have an impact on my exam score. Hopefully, my friends and I can find some way to learn a whole lot about mold this weekend. It irks me that mycology is probably represented on .0000001% of the board exam, and I have to learn it anyway.

After spending the weekend with my parents, I am just now starting to feel normal again. The solution to this problem is to make sure I create some boundaries soon, or make sure that I do my residency in Africa. 11:09 PM

I would like to make a personal statement of irritation with the directors of the Organ Systems block that was jammed into my schedule for Immunity and Infection. Are they out of their minds?! Do they honestly think that I am going to have any sort of recall for all of those antineoplastic agents? I won't! I'll be cramming them into my brain again when I take Step 1 of the USMLE in June. Hm. If you want to strike fear into the heart of any second year medical student, just say USMLE. It makes us cringe.

Sorry to focus on med school like that's all that I do, and that being a med student is how I define my existence. It's tough to avoid that when it IS all you do, all day, everyday. I remember a time when I had a life. I used to watch movies with Ryan, visit my family, and go out with my friends. I used to write letters and make phone calls. I used to be able to do the little things like go to the dentist and get my hair cut. I miss having time to do all of those things. I enjoyed them.

But, I really wanted to do this... 11:51 PM